No life goes completely unscathed. We each will fail and struggle. Whether we suffer personally or professionally there is no escaping the truth. No one goes through life with everything falling perfectly into place. No matter how it may look on the outside, we each struggle in one way or another. Rich or poor, young or old, we all have our demons.
Mentally make a promise with yourself that you will always get back up. No matter how hard the blow is, beat the 10 count. Stand proud, even if bruised and broken, and keep moving forward. It's not easy. It's not pain free. But it is worth it. Happiness, achievement, and your health are all worth pushing through any obstacle for. Your life is greater than any setback. Your goals and dreams are more valuable than the easy way path.
Promise yourself no matter how hard things become, how tough the path is, or how long the journey takes, you will persevere.
In order to continually find improvement you have to measure the metrics that matter in your life. Whether personal, financial, professional, etc. tracking your success is a must.
Sports evolved around keeping score. Within sports, various statistics are kept. When an individual, coach, or team analyzes these stats they get a better idea of who played well, what worked for the team, and what needs to be improved upon. It also offers extra motivation whenever you produce stats that make you feel successful and directly impact your goals.
Do you keep stats in your life? Do you measure how much money you saved from each pay check? Do you track the number of times you and your spouse go out on dates? Do you keep a victory log to celebrate and remind yourself of your achievements?
If not, you might consider doing so. Life is a game and depending on how you play, your stats are either bringing you closer to the Hall of Fame or getting cut. Think about what metrics are important to you...
How many workouts did I get in last week?
How much sleep did I get last night?
How many times do I tell my children I love them?
How much money am I saving/investing for our future?
How many words did I write yesterday?
What isn't tracked gets forgotten. When no records are kept, history becomes a mystery. How will you know what you've tried? How will you know what worked? How will you know where you stand in all the important areas in life unless you keep score?
Without improvement you become stale. Life, competition, and the world will leave you behind.
No one wants this. No one likes to miss a promotion or lose a job, but if you don't steadily grow within the business you will. No one wants to get left in a relationship, but when you don't commit to nurturing and developing your intimacy eventually your significant other will leave. No one wants to struggle from paycheck to paycheck, but if don't improve upon your knowledge, skill set, or work ethic, how will you ever find a steady job or make a good income?
To get the most out of life you must commit to bettering yourself. Strive everyday to improve some aspect of your life. Tiny increments add up quickly. Think about this statement from this Huffington Post article:
"1) What does 1% a day mean?
Nothing, really. It just means get a little better each day. It’s hard to quantify. But the important thing to know is this: 1% better each day, compounded, is 3,800% better each year. 1% worse each day, compounded, means you lose 97% of your value each year. That’s a big difference."
Can you improve your life by 1% today?
Every day from here on out?
Make a promise to yourself that you will find a way. Your health, knowledge, or a particular skill can always improve. Dedicate a few minutes a day to make sure you give yourself the time needed to get better. This could be the first 15 minutes of your day. Don't wait to find the time, make it. This constant and never-ending improvement isn't something that just happens. It requires focus and dedication to yourself and whatever your craft is that you're seeking to improve upon.
Listening is an important skill that requires concentration, an open mind, and the discipline to not interrupt. If you do not possess the ability to listen then your relationships and business dealings will never work out optimally.
We are all naturally self-absorbed to a certain degree. We all have selfish tendencies. It's instinct. It's part of survival. If you do not take care of yourself and your family then the risk of something horrible happening greatly increases.
Couple these selfish instincts with pride and listening can be a very challenging thing to do. It's easier when someone is praising you, but when they are speaking of themselves, or worse, criticizing you, our attention spans shorten greatly.
But without the ability to listen you will never get to know someone. You would never hear the feedback that is provided to you in order to better your personal or professional lives. To be the best version of yourself, to have thriving relationships, to succeed in all the areas of life that matter to you, you must listen.
Listen to your friends and family as they speak of their successes, failures, and challenges. Be present, but don't turn the conversation about you or tell them how to solve a problem they are dealing with (unless they specifically request your input). Many times people just need to talk, verbalize their thoughts and feelings, and have someone who will listen without judgement, persecution, or an opinion. Be the ears they need.
When feedback comes your way, be open to it. Listen and learn. Do not become defensive, angered, or confrontational. Feedback is key to improvement. If you are not doing something right in a relationship don't you want to know so you can improve it? If you are not completing a work task like you should don't you deserve to know before they fire you? If you are selling a product and something is wrong with it wouldn't you like the opportunity to correct it so that it could sell better?
Listening is difficult to do properly, but it's a important skill to reach the apex of our lives.
We all hit rough patches. We all face rejection. It's a common experience we all share and can relate to. These moments are not times we should give up and fold our hand. These are the moments we move on from with greater knowledge, motivation, and desire. We don't quit. We simply move on to the next. Take the feedback if offered. Learn from it if necessary. Then move to the next person or opportunity that might go your way.
If every locked door was a permanent detour, we'd never get in. In life though, nothing is permanent. Any mistake can be fixed. Any problem can be solved. Any relationship can be mended. It's a matter of time and determination.
If you have those two items at your disposal any dream you see, idea you think, or goal you've thought of is possible. Stick to your plan. Remain determined through rejection. Eventually, everything will work out.
We all need help. We all require assistance. At one point or another, we all depend on someone else. Whether it's in our personal or professional lives, we each find ourselves in situations where by asking for help everything would become easier. Whether it be related to chores, acquiring a loan, or asking for a raise we each can easily remember times where we were to stubborn, afraid, or shy to ask for what we needed.
I'm as big of a culprit of this as anyone. I strongly dislike asking for help. I think for me personally it's a combination of fearing rejection and judgement. For whatever reason, in my mind, if I ask for help someone may think less of me. I know this is completely ignorant 99% of the time.
I have to become better at asking. I need to become more confident, do away with the silly fears, and be willing to engage others in order for them to help me. If I don't I'm only hurting myself.
Jack Canfield has 5 Tips for how to ask for what you want.
It'll be a challenge, but I'm going to try to develop my "asking skills". I'm going to keep these tips in mind and see how much I can learn from them. It seems this is one area I could make drastic improvements in. What about you?
The double D's of success are dedication and discipline. Rarely do we achieve our goals quickly or without immense amounts of effort. They take time and energy. Success often takes weeks, months, and in many cases, years to achieve. It's not easy. If high levels of success were easy then everyone would do find it.
But they don't.
Only those with the dedication to their craft do. Only those with the discipline to learn, work, and keep trying will. You have to put your time in. You have to keep coming back, day after day. You have to keep working, month after month. You have to keep learning, year after year. Only then will your goals be met.
If you aren't willing to put in the time you will fail. If you aren't willing to live a disciplined life you won't succeed. If you are a quitter you will never find the levels of achievement you seek.
Dedicate yourself. Discipline yourself. Only then will success be reached.
Sometimes it's our biggest fears that lead us to our greatest accomplishments.
When the butterflies creep into your stomach, your hands become sweaty, and your heart races along, you know you're on the verge of bettering yourself. These are the moments where you are faced with a vital decision.
Do you take the step forward and face your fears, overcome your doubts, and become one step closer to your success? Or do you choose to retreat and take a step backwards?
It's a choice we all face. One we face repeatedly throughout our lives. If we allow our nerves and fears to dictate the choices we make and actions we take we will never reach our potential or actualize our dreams.
Use fear as a guidance system. Know that when you start to become nervous and scared you are putting yourself in a situation you can learn from. It'll be a scenario you can grow and develop from. Regardless of the outcome that follows, you've challenged yourself. You've stretched your boundaries. This is what it takes to find the glory you seek.
"For every failure, there's an alternative course of action. You just have to find it. When you come to a roadblock, take a detour." -Mary Kay Ash
We all trip on bumps in the path to success. We all have to step over obstacles through our journey of life. We all have roadblocks on our road to glory. These setbacks should never be an ending point for us. These barriers simply provide us with directions. Directions that provide us with a detour to get one step closer to the goal we're chasing.
When you face a challenge that brings about a feeling of fear or doubt you are faced with two choices. The easy, and regrettable choice, is to quit. Turn around. Run away. Slump your shoulders and leave. Or you can think. Consider what alternatives you have. Can you go right instead of left? Up instead of down.
There is no single path to any destination. There are always alternatives. When something is in your way, there is always a detour. To find the detour you must be willing to keep pushing even when situations grow tough. Keep your eyes open, mind searching, and heart pumping. If you want it bad enough, you will always find a way.
"Proper preparation prevents poor performance."
This is a quote I love and feel is very important. A good plan can be vital to success and reaching our goals. That is IF that good plan is executed.
Many of us, myself included, think and plan more than we DO. No matter how great a plan is in theory, if you do not take action, and execute the plan, then it is a horrible plan.
I see it all the time working in the fitness industry. People ask what do you think of this workout, diet, etc. They all seem great, but rarely do people follow through. Rarely do people attempt the new workout or nutrition plan. Let alone stick with it.
Paralysis by analysis is the act of over-planning, over-thinking, and over-analyzing how to do something without ever taking action. Fear of failure, the feeling that you lack the knowledge or skills, or never attempting any a plan like this before are all reasons people never take the action required to reach the success and goals they desire.
Luckily, mistakes are not the end of the road. Life isn't a one-strike and you're out game. Life is forgiving. Life gives you many opportunities. As long as you are willing to try, learn, and try again then any goal is reachable.
We are Amber and Jordan Kirbey. We are excited to share our experiences and ideas with you!